I first heard this song a couple years ago when I got “The American Song Poem Christmas album.” I like unusual music and this is nothing but unusual. It has songs like “Santa Came On a Nuclear Missile.” Hopefully he won’t be coming this year on a missile from North Korea. With Kim Jung Un and Donald Trump trading twitter barbs like two mean girls with the capacity to destroy major cities you never know.

Other songs on this album are “Daddy Is Santa Really Six Foot Four?” “Santa Fix My Toys For Christmas”, and “Santa Goes Modern.” But the song that takes the cake, or peppermint stick is “The Peppermint Stick Man” by Randall Reed With the Forerunners. Words can not do it justice. You will have to play the link to get the full effect. But Wow. Wow when I first heard this I was creeped out.

Is this supposed to be some friendly creature giving out candy or is he Pennywise’s BFF? Or is there something even creepier, sexual even in these lyrics. The first minute is a jaunty melody you would find in a circus. The melody goes on way too long. The first lyric isn’t sung until 1:03.

Just these lyrics:

Children they all love this man

With his Stick he has a plan

Now he takes his steps so free

Fills their hearts with glee

Peppermints he gives away

With the children he will play

He will twirl his stick around

And by his tricks will be spellbound

I don’t want to know his plan. I don’t want to know what he does with his stick. But the scariest lyric is this:

He is tall, erect, and straight how they wait for him

I couldn’t come up with a more disturbing lyric if I tried. Is this an ode to Yuletide pedophilia? I hope not. But the lyrics. I googled Randall Reed and the Forerunners and all that comes up is this song. There is a Randal Reed who is an automotive CEO in Texas but I doubt that it is him.

This is going to haunt me. I have to find out more about this man and this song. I will find out who this man is and why he wrote this song and what happened to him. It will take my mind off of more scary things like nuclear war and the fact that we have a mentally unstable egomaniac in the White House.

Here it is watch it if you dare.

https://youtu.be/9I1m-mO2pr0

Tomorrow I will start my countdown on the worst Christmas songs.